The Polygamy Excuse -By Okolie Kosisochukwu Esther

Infidelity is a complex issue that affects relationships regardless of gender. The notion that “men are polygamous in nature” often surfaces in discussions about infidelity. This perspective suggests that men are inherently wired to seek multiple partners, implying that cheating is less a moral failing and more an expression of innate instinct.

It’s true that some scientific ideas suggest men might have a natural tendency towards seeking multiple partners, often linked to how our ancestors reproduced. This “polygamous nature” idea gets used a lot to explain why some men cheat. The argument is that if it’s in their DNA, then it’s just how they are, and it’s not really a moral failing.

However, this line of reasoning can be a bit too simple. Human behavior is way more complicated than just biology. We’re shaped by our upbringing, the culture we live in, and the personal values we develop. Many men choose to be monogamous and are happy in those relationships, proving that nature doesn’t completely control our actions. When we use “nature” as an excuse for cheating, it takes away the individual’s responsibility for their choices and the hurt they cause.

When infidelity occurs, it is rarely a passive act dictated by genetics. It is an active choice, a decision made by an individual to violate the trust and agreements within a relationship. Shifting the blame to a supposed “polygamy excuse” does a disservice to those who are hurt by such actions and undermines the very foundation of healthy, committed partnerships.

Some men are comfortable cheating on their partners because it is the so called nature of an African man but when tables are turned, a woman isn’t expected to cheat because society expects her to be loyal and faithful and devoted to her husband. Is this to say that women also can’t be Polygamous in nature?.

For me, men should stop using that statement as an excuse for their inhumane acts. It is either you are single or you are married(to just one person), because why get married if you still have intentions of living as though you are single?

Ultimately, I believe whether men are “polygamous in nature” is a debate that should not overshadow the reality of infidelity’s impact. It is a very sensitive topic that we will keep on debating for even in years to come.

What’s more important is how we treat each other in relationships. Trust, commitment, and communication are key. While understanding potential biological influences can be interesting, it shouldn’t be used to excuse behavior that breaks trust. Ultimately, whether someone cheats is a decision they make, and focusing on that responsibility is crucial for healthy relationships, regardless of any supposed natural inclinations.